Birth is a Team Effort
Image by KathrynJBirthStories
Birth is a team effort. That’s right, I said TEAM. While mama is the star player, she needs her team right by her side playing their roles too. Partners have a very special role to play during all stages: pregnancy, labor/birth, and postpartum.
Pregnancy
During pregnancy, partners should be just as involved as educating themselves as mama. Taking the same classes, doing the homework and reading/researching, as well as talking to mama. These seemingly simple tasks are so beneficial and can help the partner be fully prepared for the immense amount of changes that happen biologically, physically, and mentally.
I remember Harold and I taking our first childbirth education class and he started off strong and then by the end, I turned over to see him watching college football on his phone. This is so common! Many childbirth education classes miss including the partner in the conversation. In my opinion this needs to change. The partner can be the game changer for labor if they are prepared. Needless to say, our first time around, we were both looking at each other in confusion for how he could help me.
Labor
Did you know that with the help of a partner, contractions can actually feel less intense? Comfort measures and counter-pressure are easy ways to help mama as she is laboring through contractions. It is actually a natural form of pain management during birth that is EXTREMELY effective.
For our second birth experience, Harold helped me so much by doing a light hip squeeze during my contractions and it made such a difference. Not only did it help me manage the contractions, physical touch releases oxytocin, the love hormone, which is necessary to help labor progress and can lessen the intensity of labor. This type of comfort measure was huge for me in labor as it took some of the intensity off of the contraction. If it didn’t take so much energy from the person doing them, I probably would’ve done this all night. So many benefits for the partner's involvement.
Mama - as you prepare for the big day, make sure you and your partner/support person practice counter-pressure. Find a video on YouTube that discusses Hip Squeezes and practice them until they feel good to mama.
Husband applying counter-pressure during a contraction
Postpartum
As much as you might think that labor is the hardest part of the birth - don’t forget about the 4th trimester. There are so many things that the partner can do to help mama during the postpartum stage - and it varies for everyone. I am a firm believer in letting mama recover in bed for the first two weeks at least. This means that the partner is more involved in the homemaking efforts for the first little bit as mama is adjusting to the new baby and all the tasks that come with the newborn stage.
While mama tends to do most of the physical work in labor, partners play a CRUCIAL role in keeping her calm, supported, and encouraged. You get to see her and have the unique opportunity to guide her through labor, but only if you know what to look for.
As I mentioned earlier, this is a TEAM effort. Both people play a role and when done correctly and it can make for a beautiful experience. Here’s a testimony of the power of a partner’s presence in labor from one of my Werk Your Birth families. “This program has brought my partner and I much closer as a team. He praises me daily and reminds me how strong and powerful I am for bringing our son into this world naturally. Furthermore, I know I couldn’t have remained as peaceful as I had without hime by my side, advocating and cheering for me. I reassure him of how important his role was and is in our relationship and I have this program to thank for that.”
If you have made it to the end of this article, that means you truly desire to be prepared and make this a joint experience. You CAN do this together and I can walk with you to do it. Join my Werk Your Birth program and I will give you all of the tools and tips you need to walk into birth equipped and empowered for your big day!